anZel/Arden

Archive for October, 2006

Happy Halloween

anZel can’t seem to decide what he wants to be…perhaps you can help him decide what he should wear this Halloween.

da Bee

da Dog

da Tiger

addiction

I am addicted to a few things anZel these days. anZel’s smell, fingers, toes, soft belly, peach fuzz hair, wrinkled forehead, soft fold behind his head and…well dare I say his cough. His helpless little cough always perks my ears up (in case it’s serious) and gives me the giggles. It usually happens when he drinks too fast or when he is too busy playing and forgets to swallow his own spit.

Would CPS come knocking on my door if I record it for keep sake and share it with the world?

The joy of motherhood–2nd quarter

I am happy to report that the second quarter has been much better than the first. I am able to see more “reward” in being a mum. First of all, he is no long a blob of fresh. Things have definitely gotten easier in some ways and hard in others. All these growth/progress are a mixed blessing—anZel is growing as a person and is becoming more independent.

One of the most important milestones was anzel sleeping thru the night since he was 19 weeks. That means 12 hours for us. Occasionally, he might wake up a couple of times during the night because of nightmares or just want to keep us on our toes and let us know who the boss is. We are all grateful for this much needed rest we have been having. He has also learned to fall asleep on his own at night. I had a lump in my throat standing outside of his bedroom waiting for him to go to sleep last night. He was talking and playing by himself before falling asleep. How the past three months has flown by in a blink of an eye! I now miss rocking him to sleep until my arm falls asleep. I miss cuddling with him before going to bed. His independence makes me feel incredibly cheated as I have to return to work when he is much more interactive. From seeing him 24×7 to only two hours a day is a huge adjustment on my part. Now that he is able to fall asleep by himself…I feel my time with him is slowly chipping away. I can only imagine later that a dump truck is probably more fun than mummy’s kisses and hugs and pee-a-poo. Perhaps I don’t mind that blob of flesh as much as I think.

Other than the four-month regular check up and a little ER visit for his rash, anzel has only been in the hospital two times in the past three months. That’s a huge improvement compare to the 22 times in the first quarter. That said, he had his first cold and tummy ache. It took him almost two weeks to get over his cold. During those two weeks, Dad and I had fun being anzel’s plumber by sucking fluid out of his nose. Watching him throw up, on the other hand, is not as much fun. He caught some sort of bug and was not able to keep any fluid down for a good six hours. It was heartbreaking to watch him throw up. It was unlike any projectile we had seen. I could actually see his stomach muscle contracting. Sure glad it is behind us now.

Anzel is definitely showing his personality more. He is a pretty serious and mellow guy. He doesn’t like to laugh much but would always award us with a big grin with peek-a-boo. He doesn’t fuss much these days either. He is happy hanging out with us whether we are at the shops and restaurants. He likes to take it all in by watching people or cars go by. When he sees something he likes, he will mostly raise his hands. If needed, he would give a good shout.

He is now on See Food Diet. For most people, that means you appreciate the food with your eyes not your mouth. Not for my little bean here. Whatever he sees, he wants to eat it or at least have a taste. Shoes, keys, toes, neck, dirty rag. This reminds me of a saying that some people will eat anything with four legs except a table. Anzel would probably go as far as tasting a table whether it has three or four legs.

There are a few words he seems to respond to…they are car, squirrel and a gourd with seashell. I believe he likes car because he likes their movement. The squirrel and gourd are another story. Whenever anzel refuses to eat, Grandma Helen would always bring him to the glass sliding door facing the yard and tells him that there are squirrels out there (There is a family of three baby squirrels living on an Italian cypress.) The squirrels may be too fast for anzel to see. But he seems to understand that there is something out there that he shouldn’t be missing. There is also a gourd with seashell from Mexico. Anzel likes to touch the shells when he is out in the yard. He also seems to understand “wait”. When he gets antsy, I would tell him “wait”. He usually would stop for a little while. He has also started to talk a bit more. Lately, everything is a variation of “da da”. This makes Dad extremely happy and proud.

I have learned a lot during the past three months. It’s hard to pinpoint when I realize that motherhood can actually be enjoyable with guilty-free moments of pure joy. I no longer feel guilty and jealous when I hear mothers who are soaked in the joy of motherhood. I also realize what incredible job I have as a parent without second guessing myself all the time if I am qualify for the job. I also have much deeper appreciations for all parents, especially my own parents. I have crossed the chasm of singleton to motherhood. I have truly enjoyed the second quarter, so much so that I am starting to understand why OTHER people are crazy enough to have baby #2.

anZel laughing out loud

anZel really laughed out loud today when I was throwing ping pong balls around…

Pumpkin Patch

anZel was about to have some solefood before we went to the pumpkin patch…

Ummm…this isn’t as comfortable as I thought…

Are we done yet?

Pumpkin for sale…$9.50…

Can we take this one home?

Do we have to go home now?

anZel playing with a red balloon

anZel on the playground swing

He’s the youngest on the swing there…

Lemonade

People say when life gives you a lemon, make lemonade. Well, if you drive by the house, you will see anzel selling it outside.

We have been having lemonade as a main course for the past few weeks. The household has been experiencing a number of household woes lately. First we found extensive mold under our kitchen sink. So we have been out of a kitchen for a several weeks. Then we found a leak in one of the bathrooms. That’s the contractor’s next project. Instead of working for our current employers, we are working for the contractor. I hate to generalize but it’s incredibly painful dealing contractors. Last but not least, we might have some uninvited guest co-habiting with us.

Perhaps by Thanksgiving, we will have turkey as main course instead of lemonade.

anZel playing ping pong…random photos…

Got anZel a few ping pong balls to play with last week. Supposedly it will train him to grab onto objects. He seems to enjoy playing with them in this movie…

who put this hat on me like that?!

don’t I look adorable in this picture?

me buying apples in China Town

look ma…I can stand up now!

120

My first week back to work has gone by fast. The first day back at work wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be. But then I wasn’t sure if it was because of the fog I was in from cold medicine or the sleep deprivation from worrying about anzel’s rash. My husband had the joy of being in ER for 12:30 am to 4:30 with anzel while I was under the influence with NyQuil at home. I found myself driving to work with a lump in my throat. It quickly disappeared when I tried to sort through emails and voicemails.

When I have down time at work, I find myself remember anzel’s chubby cheeks, the creases on his forehead, the soft fold at the back of his head, the dimples at the back of his hands, the raspberries he likes to make and the snorting sounds he makes when he sleeps…

At the end of my 8^th hour at work, I make mad dash to my car and hit the road. When offered to have lunch, I struggle to say yes as it would mean another hour away from getting home to see the little bean. Once I am on the road, my brain keeps thinking about ways to get home quickly. I agonize each minute I sit in traffic. Sometimes I find myself saying to the follow drivers…can’t you see I am trying to see my son. Then I realize…how many of us wish we could be at home right now. This feeling of desperation and infatuation is hard to describe. As I look back the past year…I shouldn’t feel surprised of how hard this going-back-to-work is for me. We were attached to the hip for 9 months…then 5 months of semi-attached to the hip. Then came Monday, I only have two precious hours with him. 120 minutes…it’s hardly enough.