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Written by beeber on October 2, 2006 – 7:48 am -My first week back to work has gone by fast. The first day back at work wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be. But then I wasn’t sure if it was because of the fog I was in from cold medicine or the sleep deprivation from worrying about anzel’s rash. My husband had the joy of being in ER for 12:30 am to 4:30 with anzel while I was under the influence with NyQuil at home. I found myself driving to work with a lump in my throat. It quickly disappeared when I tried to sort through emails and voicemails.
When I have down time at work, I find myself remember anzel’s chubby cheeks, the creases on his forehead, the soft fold at the back of his head, the dimples at the back of his hands, the raspberries he likes to make and the snorting sounds he makes when he sleeps…
At the end of my 8th hour at work, I make mad dash to my car and hit the road. When offered to have lunch, I struggle to say yes as it would mean another hour away from getting home to see the little bean. Once I am on the road, my brain keeps thinking about ways to get home quickly. I agonize each minute I sit in traffic. Sometimes I find myself saying to the follow drivers…can’t you see I am trying to see my son. Then I realize…how many of us wish we could be at home right now. This feeling of desperation and infatuation is hard to describe. As I look back the past year…I shouldn’t feel surprised of how hard this going-back-to-work is for me. We were attached to the hip for 9 months…then 5 months of semi-attached to the hip. Then came Monday, I only have two precious hours with him. 120 minutes…it’s hardly enough.
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