anZel/Arden

Archive for August, 2007

in search of day care (#2; non-cliff note version)

Many people are curious about our childcare situation. Most are surprised that anZel is still at home and that Grandma Helen is still taking care of him. Frankly, I am surprised that Grandma lasted this long provided that she only took care of me and my brother full time 67 days each. That was the legal maternity leave then.

Lately, we have drummed up our effort in our childcare search because Grandma really needs a break; anZel can benefit in a more structured environment and learn how to share with others (his days of being #1 in the house is numbered, more on that later); and Grandma really deserves a break.

We have gone with recommendations from friends, newspaper and web ads. I did my homework by searching the net for appropriate questions for daycare before we visited our first daycare. dAd and I were only permitted to visit this place because she was afraid we would disturb her routine. The lady gave us a tour of the place while four or five kids sat and strapped to a row of boasters. They all ate their food diligently. A few even took time to address us. This reminds me of what prison would be like one day if I don’t send anZel to a daycare soon. This was a home daycare. The younger children are luckier as they get to play in the living room with a bay window. There was plenty of light. The older kids gets to stay at the family faces the backyard. There is hardly any light coming thru even at 11 am. Compared to our house where anZel has free reign of cabinets, space and attention, this wasn’t the place I wanted to send him even it came with a recommendation from a friend. The first one I visited. I was shocked and confused about my emotion when I walked out of the daycare crying. There was nothing wrong with that daycare. My expectations were terribly skewed. I was hoping we could find the same exact environment as home for anZel. This isn’t realistic.

So off we go again to look for more. In the meantime, I ask parents whenever I can for daycare references. Most parents are generous about sharing the information. There was one who recommended a place to us. We then find out that they pulled their kids out because they didn’t like the place. There was also a mum who refused to provide the name of her childcare lady even though she and her son love the place. She would “ask” her if she would take anZel in. Before she asked, she told me that anZel is too young to go to her lady. They are all a bunch of two year old. He would be too young to join in. I wasn’t surprised when she called a couple weeks later saying her lady wouldn’t take anZel.

I have heard that some parents visit close to a hundred daycares before selecting one. We haven’t gone that far and hope that we don’t have to do that in order to find one we like. So far, we have what we find a wide variety of daycare experience. Here are some of my observations: a center that smells like the hospital (it was VERY clean); nervous daycare provider asking us if we have visited other places (duh!), if it would be convenience for us to drop off our son to their daycare (DUH!), claims to speak Cantonese and Mandarin but couldn’t really speak neither of them correctly (DOH!), childcare provider discourages us to visit or give surprise visit…we should trust her, children provider who won’t let us meet other parents and would only let us visit before the kids get there, childcare provider has a hard time remembering how many kids she takes care of.

The most comical one was last Friday when we visited a daycare near our house. The teacher told us we should visit at 11 SHARP so we can see how the kids learn. Fantastic! The teacher opened the door with a vacuum tube in his hand (check) and told us where we should sit. The three of us sat in miniture chairs and watched him give his lessons. “Children, we are going to learn (in Chinese) the alfabet (in what seems to be English). What is (in Chinese) alFAbet (in Chinglish)?” “ABCs” the children shouted. He brought out a three-ring white 2” binder and flipped to plastic covered printout of A (no colour, just a white outlined capital “A” and lower case “a”) and an apple. “Children, what is this? (in Chinese)” Children shouted in “A”. As he closed the three ring binder, other materials fell out and one of the children started to burst into a laugh. The other children followed. The class of twelve children was in uproar. At his point, the teacher drummed the vacuum tube on the floor and said “Quite” (in Chinglish). The class was back in order except Marcus. “MARCUS, sit properly (in Chinese), pAi attention (in Chinglish).”

I think dAd summed it well. We would like anZel to learn his languages from native speakers in a stimulaing bright environment and will be able to play outside daily. As I sit on this idea of finding the right place for anZel, I am looking for similar home environment with opportunities to learn and grow for him. There is no place like home. He will always come home to us.

anZel stacking wood blocks

Lately, anZel has finally taken interested in stacking blocks (one of the assignments from Grandpa Sam). So far, he is able to stack four on top of each other. He usually likes an audience for that kind of performance. Or if he does it on his own, he will call for everyone in the house to check it out. In this video, he seemed rather disappointed that mum wasn’t rushing to see his latest accomplishment.

pizza….

We were lazy today so instead of cooking, we grabbed a Costco’s pizza (ok ok, we were desparate…I know…) for dinner. As soon as we started eating, anZel started saying “pizza…pizza…” as if he wants to eat pizza too. I was totally caught off guard and didn’t realize what he was saying. I guess he remembered the word from last time we had pizza.

Funny thing is he doesn’t really want to eat any toppings or cheese. He just wants to eat the dough part. He will spit out anything other than the dough…sigh.

in search of day care

anZel’s 15 months now and it’s about time to kick him out of the house!! beeber and I really wants him to have some structure or routine in his daily life, instead of the do-whatever-you-like-during-whatever-time type of routine. Well, the only routine he has really is to sleep around 8:30-9pm. (I am also secretly hoping that we make the feeding issue someone else’s problem.

We’ve started looking at some of the day cares around here. Most of the day cares aren’t that great. I am starting to think our requirements are too stringent.

1. Given that Mandarin is the official language in China, we wanted anZel to learn Mandarin. So we wanted to find a place where they speak good Mandarin. Half-a** mandarin-speaking day cares are definitely no-go. This requirement essentially limits us to only Chinese day care places.
2. We don’t want half-a** English speaking places either. We are not worried that anZel won’t learn English. After all, we live in the good ol’ U S of A. What we don’t really want is anZel pick up “strange” accents. So if we visit a day care that speaks English to the kids and have a heavy accent, it’s a no go. (We visited one today and it really bugged us.)
3. We speak Cantonese at home and we do want anZel to continue to speak Cantonese. But same as #1 and #2, we don’t want anZel to pick up some “bad” Cantonese accent. So half-a** Cantonese speaking places are out.

Ok, by now you are probably calling us snobs and that our requirements are dumb. But hey, we just want the best for anZel. Many Chinese day care these days claim multi-lingual in order to attract parents. the unfortunate thing is that most of them have heavy “weird” accents in at least 1 language. Some even have problem with all 3!!

Aside from daily routines and languages, we also wanted anZel to have a place to learn.

4. The place has to provide structured education for the kids. We really do like day cares that provide some form of structured learning for kids. Most places provide a curriculum, but you really have to sit through one of them before you know how they teach. There’s a lot of places also claim to follow the MONTESSORI philosophy. Be sure you watch how the kids play and interact with the teachers.
5. As mentioned in #4, we would like to sit through a session or two to see how kids interact. Some of the Chinese places we have been to seems to not want parents to sit through the sessions. The excuse being that they don’t want the kids to be distracted. Well, I am sorry but I don’t think it’s fair for the parents to just “take your words for it.”
6. The place must be bright. Some of the day cares we saw are in fairly dark houses and we really prefer to find one that’s bright. We believe brighter places have happier kids.
7. It goes without saying the place must be clean. If I see carpets are all stained or got tons of black stuff on it, that place is out.
8. We would prefer to have a place where there’s outdoor activities. anZel’s been going out to the local park almost every day since he’s 3 months old. He loves going outside. We would hate to have him locked up in the house all day long.
9. Teacher to kids ratio must not exceed 1:4. We saw some places that have ratio of 1:6, which is crazy!! (I thought that’s illegal?)

let’s see..what else…

for dA record: August 07

words: apple, arden, anzel, auntie, ba ba (elderly man), baby, ball, balloon, banana, beads, bear, bed, belt, bol bol (his chinese name), book, booger, brain, bug, button, bye, car, carrot, cat, cha (put on lotion, cream or ointment), chair, cheerio, cheese, cloth (his blanket), cup, cut, dadi, diaper, dog, draw picture, eagle, fart, fall (object), fish, flag, flower, fly, foot, fork, garbage can, garbage truck, gong gong (maternal grandpa), guai (good behavior), hand, hanger, head, help, hi, hold, horse, hot, knife, lamp, leave, lid, lotus leave, lotus flower, ma ma (grandma), mami, mole, monster, moon, no problem, oatmeal, older brother, older sister, orange, paci (pacifier), pants, pao pao (maternal grandma), peepee, pen, pig, pinch, pizza, plane, poem, potty, quack quack (for duck), ship, shirt, shoes, shovel, sit, skin, sleep, socks, sneeze, spider, spoon, star, street, tall, tree, uncle, wa wa (doll), water, watermelon, wet, word, wrap, ye ye (grandpa), yes, younger brother.

Alphabet: A, C, D, G, I, K, Q, T, W, Z

Numbers: 1, 2, 3, 4, 8, 10 (chinese); free, four, five

Short Sentences: Daddy drives, mommy drives, daddy bye bye, plastic spoon fell, mum shirt

Next up: C Programming

A very relevant article I found on Digg this morning: Why Toddlers’ Vocabulary Grows Quickly

free four five

ladies’ man

Whether it’s in our local park or at company picnic, anZel seems to be popular among the ladies. Advice from fellow men: enjoy it while you can.

joy of motherhood >> 1st quarter year 2

15 months. I can’t say that I have grown as much as anZel. Well, I have grown in ways I prefer not to. I will expand on that later.

Although anZel has improved a great deal in his food consumption, he still operates on minimum food in take each day. Comparing to children his age, he eats like a bird and therefore weights like one. I believe he has finally broken the 20lb mark. Friends ask if anZel has a favorite food. Really, this child doesn’t like to eat. He eats his regular steel cut oatmeal w/fruit or yogurt, rice with veggies and chicken, milk and string cheese. These are his daily staple. While these are relatively healthy food and choices, variety isn’t in the book for us at the moment.

I have never imagined how much joy it is to see the world from my child’s eyes. Yesterday, as I strapped him into his car seat, he pointed at the door light on the roof of the car and said “light”. anZel is no Thomas Edison. Nonetheless, I can’t help but amaze at how much he understands and sees the world all around him. He pointed at an elderly man walking on the side walk and said “grandpa” this morning. You mean he can think on his own? Sometimes I have to pinch myself and ask if this is really the blob that refused to understand that we were not poisoning him with milk or food.

There are times I wish I could document every minute of his life so far. He seems to surprise all of us on a daily basis. I love to see him slowly back into the stair and sit down. Sometimes he misses and sits on the floor with a thump. He also likes to brushes his teeth with us in the morning. He asks for his toothbrush, walks to our platform bed, and slowly backs to the edge of the bed to sit while brushing. Lately, he has grown tired of what he sees at 30” level. He would ask to be held whatever possible to see what’s going on at 5’2” level. If I am lucky, he would hug me and pat me on my back after I lift him up.

anZel’s favorite thing to do lately has been opening and closing lids…equal opportunities for pots and bottles or anything with lids. If he accidentally picks up the lid with his right hand, he would put everything down on the floor neatly and pick up the lid with his left hand. I guess we have a lefty here.

One thing I am embarrassed to admit is that anZel is probably the cleanest person of the three of us. He takes after Grandma Helen. He picks up his toys before his bath (almost) every night. He has free range of the cabinets in the kitchen except the ones under the sink. Whenever he does an excavation, he puts all the content back.